i watched a good movie tonite...honestly i thought it was going to be gay but no i liked it. this week has been pretty good. my ear is healing good. cj boyd will be at main street this up comming tuesday. i cannot wait to see him so everyone do come out its free. i had my little sis take some kick ass pictures of me tonite...however they are somewhat risky. i like them. tomorrow nite im going to see mexico mexico...i hope things dont get awkard because eric will be there and well he hates me...i dont hate him nor am i asking people to hate him on my account. maybe i shouldnt go...what do you think?
so i should be cleaning my room. i have been for a while now, its THAT messy. i swear i have the worst luck when it comes to hurting peoples feelings seriously i try not to step on peoples toes and it seems like the more i watch out for their toes the more i step on them. i just need to worry about myself and not how others are going to react because i waste so much time worring about your feelings i dont have time to give myself what i want. gotta look out for number 1.
i wanna be hotter than fuck. oh yeah i have strep ugh.
i always made fun of those girls that tried so hard toget a boyfriend and now i feel like im one of them.....i am one of them i feel desperate for affection. i guess im having withdrawls...HAHA wait no im not because what affection did i ever get? i want my stuff back....i hope he didnt burn it.
i had someone tell me once that those days when you wake up a fell the sudden urge to clean is just you telling yourself your life is a mess...if thats the case i've cleaned, sweept, mopped, steamcleaned, organized, re-decorated, washed, dryed, and fix everything there is in my house. i still dont feel satified.
i swear i can see the future the other day i wrote;
she wears her anger like a sweater
it keeps her warm at night
you know I'D LOVE TO UNDRESS HER
BUT WE'D ONLY FIGHT
they are lyrics from a song and it hit me just now that there must have been a reason i took that to heart just a day ago. funny how we are such loving creatures, yet we are fools when it comes to love.
dear diary: i got into trouble with this one.it hit me hard. it leaves me miserable, anxious and wanting MORE.
i love the simple life. nicole richie is my role model.
whats the use?
so i made a total ass of myself once again, i cant ever just be chill. i have a very important decision to be making right now i can either
A)call eric and start fresh...hopefully and then have to deal with my two best friends constantly at each others throats
its not easy to decide i want the best of both worlds.
b e s t
1. Male Friend: eric
2. Female friend: morgan
3. Time of day: early morning
4. Day of the week: Saturday.
5. Food: pasta!
6. Memory: childhood ones
l a s t
1. Person you saw: morgan
2. Person you talked to on the phone: sean eww.
3. Hugged: eric
4. Texted: dont have that.
T o d a y
1. What are you doing now: chilling
2. Wearing: t-shirt
3. Better than yesterday: yeah i guess so
t o m o r r o w
1. Is: Wednesday
2. Got any plans: work! movie? i dunno
3. Goal: $$$$
4. Dislikes: work
f a v o r i t e
1. Number: eight.
2. Song: anything tbs
3. Color: green
4. Season: summer
c u r r e n t l y
1. Missing: no one
2. Mood: sleepy
3. Wanting: money. adventure. money. money. money
t r u e & f a l s e
I am a cuddler: true unless im hot
I am a morning person: Ehhh, true and false.
I am a perfectionist: False!
I am currently suffering from a broken heart: er...uh...
I am left handed: true and flase im both!
I am addicted to myspace: true
I am very shy: To certain people, true.
I can be paranoid at times: hardly true
I enjoy jazz music: uhhh...hardly true
I enjoy smoothies: True.
I enjoy talking on the phone: true
I have a hard time paying attention at school: depends..
I have at least one brother and/or sister: True.
I have been told that I am smart: True.
I have been told that I have a good sense of humor: True.
I have broken a bone: False.
I have changed a diaper: True.
I have changed a lot over the past year: True.
I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color: False.
I have had surgery: true
I have killed another person: FALSE.
I have had my hair cut within the last week: False.
I have had the cops called on me: False.
i wish i had your answers, you ask me all the time. even when you dont speak a word your eyes are asking me. i know this doesnt seem right for us....its not comfortable, but thats just it...we are comfortable with each other. they say you should step out of your comfort zone to truely find meaning in life, i dont want just meaning i want to know life. i want to live life. trust me there is no one else just adventure ahead its only one more notch in my belt before i come home. you should try it too. your find alot out about yourself and its a fun and intresting feeling to once again find your self with butterflies. hell maybe we'll grow up this summer.